Salad bar! Cool! Look at that! Is that heart of palm? Those look like eggplant. Is that cheese? I think that's cheese. Definitely cheese. With something inside. There's that enormous watercress. Calamari salad? I didn't know that was a thing. Sushi? Dude is making fresh sushi. I guess I should try some. That tuna looks amazing. What's in here? Stuffed clams. Shrimp. Okay then. Back to the table, I guess. Don't want to fill up on salad.
Holy cow. Or is that, wholly cow? I've never seen such a chunk of barbecued meat traipsing around a dining room. Sure, I'll try the lamb. Sirloin? OK. Prime rib? Not my favorite, but it would be rude not to try it here. Chicken thighs! Sausage! Sirloin! Chicken hearts? Well, I'm not in America. I should go for it. Fried yucca? Sure, that sounds like an interesting side dish. Grilled salmon - that would be a nice palate cleanser. Filet mignon? I'm getting a little full, but I should certainly try that. Lamb chop. That wasn't the best thing tonight. I should try that... Hey, has that waiter been by before? He is hot, if you like that smoldering dark-eyed Latin business. I should really stop eating, but I want him to bring whatever that is over here.
Oh my God, why did I get that? I can't eat all that. I can't even stand up. I will eat nothing but salad for the next week. Maybe a piece of fish. But mostly salad. I am so fat. I am so fat. I am so fat.
That waiter really is good looking.
I will never eat again. Never. Again. Eat. Meat. Anything.
Too much meat. Too. Much.